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Before reading Nice: Why We Love To Be Liked And How God Calls Us To More, I never really thought about being “nice” as a problem. However, according to the author, Sharon Hodde Miller, God did not call us to be merely nice people. Miller explains how niceness can become an idol, and defines niceness as “the ways we make ourselves pleasant, agreeable, acceptable, or likable in order to get something.” When a Christian’s ultimate goal is to be “nice”, Miller shows how the result can be inauthenticity, corruption, cowardice, cynicism, self-righteousnes, or sentimentality.
Miller is careful to emphasize that as Christians, we are still called to kindness, gentleness and love. In no way is she advocating that we abandon niceness in favor of harshness, meanness, mud-slinging or name-calling. I really admire how the author is able to weave personal stories as well as stories from the Bible to illustrate the ways in which striving to be “nice” can actually lead to strife. Nice is a book that really made me reevaluate my own motives and ultimate goals for being nice. I would encourage anyone who thinks of themselves as a “nice” person to read this book and see if it challenges his or her notions of niceness as well.